Damn, this is starting to feel like work.

Thumper

Meet Thumper. Thumper’s most distinctive feature is the absence of a tail. It was recently explained to me that this is the way he was born, but I’m having a hard time accepting that. You see, Thumper is fearless, and I don’t mean fearless in a heroic kind of way, I mean fearless in a lack of common sense, isn’t afraid even when he really really should be, kind of way. I always imagined that there was some fascinating story of extreme stupidity behind that missing tail, and I’m having trouble shaking it off.

Other interesting facts:

  • Has a foot fetish (seriously, wtf?).
  • Enjoys extreme sports.
  • Is Alfie’s brother.
  • My wife thinks he’s cute handsome (and sweet).